that’s where the family dynamics become business dynamics.  and they get swept under the rug.  swept under the rug but the dynamics show up on everyone’s performance review.  even if you think you’ve documented the hell out of everything.  there’s no hiding from them.  and it’s difficult to be prepared for the crazy swirl.

when i started this blog a few years ago i worked for someone who was in a role that was far too senior for her.  it also was in an industry which she had no experience.  ecommerce tools that she’d never seen previously.  the list is pretty long.  i was sitting with a wonderful young and incredibly sharp analyst who said, “you know, work just shouldn’t suck”.  so succinct.  so astute.

how many years has worked sucked for you?  for me work has sucked off and on for 20-26 years or so.  almost always due to who i reported, or who was in the management chain.  very rarely was it the people around me or my customers or the products.  not even the hours.  sometimes it was the shoes.  when i worked at McDonald’s it definitely was the polyester uniform.  ugh.

oh the manager’s i’ve had to work for/with/under.  as my current boss calls me “poker face”, i can’t hide how i feel, every manager knew when i didn’t respect them.  not respecting my manager was the fast track to despising them.  it started out not trusting their decision making skills.  then not trusting their judgement.  then not respecting them.  onto not liking them.  quickly coming to the slippery slope of intense feelings of “oh god.  i gotta get out of here”.

before i move on, i want to thank a few managers who knew how to “manage” me.  john callan, spike lemle, mike (from the olive garden), my current boss eric mueller, and sadly i can’t seem to bring up other names.  in all of those years, that’s all i got.  (yes, i know that’s bad english)

these were people who gave brought goals, said meet them, then stepped back.  i was at their door when i needed them, got lonely, checked in and delivered.  over delivered really.  funny that.  leave the obnoxious jewish girl to her own devices and she’ll over deliver.  someone should bottle it.

my doctor said manage your stress, your BP is too high.  it’s all relative, isn’t it?  what makes one stressful.  work environments that fit like your child’s shoe, or lack of structure that leaves you swimming in water at nose level at all the wrong times.

following my doc’s orders i planned my escape from memphis to nashville.  the green hills, fresher air, less violence and being near my high school BFF should help do the trick.  i was pretty comfortable designing jewelry, training dogs and just looking around craigslist.com to scout out potential clients.

when i see the words “microsoft technology”, “consulting”, “marketing”, “microsoft partner” in a job ad, of course i sit up and take notice.  after all of my years at microsoft i wondered what would be happening in nashville that suits my skills.   the email sent changed my course, plans, expectations and here i am.  in HEALTHCARE.  wtf?

it takes a special kind of salesperson to get me to sign on to a start up consulting company.  and it turns out that Eric Mueller is more than just the sales guy who convinced me to become the marketing department of WPC Services www.WPC-Services.com in franklin, tn.  yeah, he’s really smart.  just like the old days at Microsoft.  and he’s passionate.  and young.  (wow…i’ve really gotten old) and a little iconoclastic.  yep.  that’s what got me.  Eric Mueller and his team are going to turn the healthcare consulting world on its ear.

i’ve been inside the company now for four weeks.  everyone is no BS.  i fit in, and i’m at home.  hard workers, committed to excellence, risk takers, but not short cut takers.  all of them.  you can’t make it here if you don’t have quality, honesty and integrity.  you have to admit when you don’t know something.  you can grumble when you’re wrong.  it’s all about the owning up.

as i’m beginning the journey to create the next branding strategy (not there ever really was a strategy before) i think about “OWN IT”.  own your shit.  to the healthcare companies, own that you don’t know how to get ready for ICD-10 (i didn’t even know what it was until last week), own that you chose the big tech guys last time so you could blame them, own that you just can’t face what’s coming down the road with the new regulations.  OWN IT.  that’s why WPC Services is here.  really smart people who can make it all work.

not me.  i’m in the marketing office.  but i know that these guys really know and own their shit.

can i make that our tagline?

1) what to do about an employee who “bad mouths” the organization.  uh-oh.  after the hysterical laughing around the table a few clear answers came up. 

a. what was the TV show that coined the phrase “OH GROW UP!” ?

b. put your big girl/boy pants on and get over it.

c. WTF is “bad mouthing” in a corporation?  is this junior high school?

d. why waste time listening to gossip?  it’s so unproductive.  if an employee has an issue, ask them.  or they tell you, listen.  if you’re not listening then they’ll tell others.  and they’ll tell others.  and so on.  guess who really created the mess?

e. how much truth is  there in the “bad mouthing”?  bet you’ll find some.  deal with it.

f. use it.  use it to grow.  use it to change.  use it to prove them wrong.

g.  get over it you pansy. (no one knew what to say if it was a female manager that was insulting enough.  general consensus was the writer was a male.  we don’t think a woman would use the term “bad mouthing”.  but we could be wrong)

2) the writer was certain they’d been clear with direction, but the employees didn’t get it.

a. oh boy. were you looking for someone to blame?  cause you’ve missed some boat somewhere somehow.  we don’t know what where or how.  but you should seek out professional help.

b.  pretty much, the question alone leads us to the original conclusion…get with a management consultant that can guide you.  you may need some professional assessment for your skills and your team.  but we know that you can find the right answers if you are open.  fully present.  and choose to learn from these experiences.

good luck!

• 1. Define the Problem-Work with the employee to pinpoint and define the complaint. Ask probing questions like, “Is something brewing that I should know about? Why is this bothering you? What made you come to me?” Help them help you figure it out.
• 2. Identify the Motivation-Why is the person complaining? Is it personal, or is the employee speaking for a group? What is at stake?
• 3. Suggest Solutions-Push the employee to help come up with ideas to move the issue from a complaint to something more constructive. What action will help in this situation? Who needs to be involved? What is a reasonable timeline for implementing a solution?
• 4. Resolve the Issue-Once you come up with a solution, implement it immediately. By putting it off, you risk having the issue grow and continue to plague the individual or the organization.

1)  the term “bad mouthing” itself is negative and sounds like an emotional response from the manager.  whenever there’s scuttlebutt from employees, gossip and a game of “telephone” being played, it’s best to not believe anyone.  it’s a better use of a managers time to understand where their leadership might best soothe nerves, identify the issues, support the employees who are dissatisfied and truly lead through the rough patches.  stepping up as a leader, moving away from gossip, and being present for the employee is required.

2) unhappiness, dissatisfaction etc can come from stem from many issues.  ask the employee what’s up.  good old fashioned army training says there are no bad recruits, only bad leaders.  if there are issues with the team, they reflect on the weaknesses of the manager.  we all have weaknesses.  and we all have ineffective areas that we can’t see.  if an employee(s) happens to hit one of those areas, be thankful.  it’s an opportunity for growth.

3) mary ann foster said  an employee that didn’t disparage or complain or whine about their organization at some point really doesn’t have a pulse.

4) john blanchett said “don’t waste time with hearsay. whether it’s true or not, the manager’s job is to be a leader.  a good leader should be able to sit down and ask how to help.  ultimately, that’s the job.  helping your people/team find success.  whatever it takes. 

5)  i forgot to write down the name of the person who sent this message–don’t take anything personally.  the organization doesn’t. 

hope that helps.

for over 20 years i’ve followed the money.  and i got it.  alot of it.  then i lost it.  but i lost me first. then i lost the money.  then gradually i started to find me.  now i have no money, but i have me.  and i’m much much much older.  ;>) and hopefully smarter.  the universe has kicked me in the butt and i’m facing the reality of my life.  it’s time for a change.  and i need to follow at least two of my passions to make money.  just one won’t really do it.  but i’m willing to control my life now and not rely on the false structure of the corporate world.  i really wanted to believe that someone/something would take care of me.  (more on what that driver is about)  i’m stepping out, moving forward…

Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow

Why don’t we do what we really love. Why do most of us choose ‘the bird in the hand’ over the ‘many in the bush’. Sometimes, it has little or nothing to do with money. Maybe it has to do with something internal to ourselves- our fear of failure, or the unknown or rejection. In short, we need to question ourselves as to why we do what we do.

The simple and short answer for most people is money. Whatever it is that we currently do either pays the bills, pays the most, or is what we felt at some point in time was the most, if not the best, we could get. It has nothing to do with our likes, our desires or our talents. Many people fall into a situation one way or another, or are lured into something by hook or by crook. Ask yourself if something like this even remotely applies to you:

You spend your entire life judging your own worth based on the opinions of those you look up to, hold in high esteem/regard, and yet they have absolutely no respect for you, your ideas, your perspective, or even you as a human being. You spend a great deal of time doing things for the benefit of others, yet you yourself do not reap any of the benefits or rewards.

You do what others tell you to do, and get only what they think you deserve, and not what you want, or more importantly, need. They could care less about your wants, or your needs, and all that matters to them is that they get what they want from you.

You stay in toxic, hostile, life-draining situations out of fear, because you do not know what to do next, or because this is what you know, this is what is secure, and take the paycheck (always with a large serving of abuse), only to end up at the mercy of those who, quite literally, could not give two s—s about you.

If it does, then Do What You Love is required reading for you.

Marsha Sinetar’s book, Do What You Love, The Money Will Follow seeks to answer the inter-related questions why we do what we do and why we do not do what we love by going deeper than the superficial reasons almost always given as answers to these questions. Too many people have missed the point of this book, which is unfortunate. Many readers and more than a few reviewers are too caught up on the money side of the proposition. Others see it as a choice between love with poverty and hate with plenty. Ms. Sinetar states right in the beginning that the money may not materialize immediately, and maybe not at all. For those of us who were not born with a strong character, it takes real courage to act on what we value. Those that are truly successful achieve not only because they love what they do and are good at what they do, they consistently achieve great things because they have the courage to act on their convictions.

Which in the end is what this book is really all about- having the courage to act on one’s convictions. The true purpose of the book is to force those of us who know what we love to do to look inward, and ask some very tough questions of ourselves. Why are we doing this, and why aren’t we doing what we love? Only we can answer these questions for ourselves, and no book is going to have the answers for us, for each one of us is unique in experience. This book helps the reader to uncover those hidden barriers, which may be psychological or spiritual or both, that prevent us from acting on our convictions and doing what we love.

The book assumes from the outset that you the reader know what your right livelihood is. This can be an important drawback for many readers that are still searching for their right livelihood. Essentially, the book delves into what prevents many of us from doing what we love. More often than not, the thing keeping us from doing the work we love is internal to ourselves, though in more than a few cases, very real physical and external barriers prevent us from pursuing our right livelihood. The book really stresses getting to know yourself before getting busy, or as was often said in 1970s, getting down. As an aside, it really helps if you are preferably young, single, used to a low overhead, not obligated to support one or more dependents, and finally and most important, not encumbered in some kind of co-dependent relationship. And the rest of you can still get something out of the book, though it will be much more difficult (but not impossible) to implement its lessons.

In short, this book forces us to think. It asks us to ponder some difficult issues- where we have been, where we are now, where we would like to be, and where we will end up if we continue our past and present behavior, and how best to determine what it will take to get us where we would like to be.

Those who read this book and are still concerned about the money issue should read ‘Your Money Or Your Life’ by Julie Dacyzyn and the late Joe Dominguez in conjunction with this book. In any case, please do not take this book to an extreme. Before you make the plunge, do a little planning. The more planning you do, before you take the plunge, the better.

A more appropriate title for this book is: Do What You Love and the Rewards Will Come. Money is but one of the rewards.

i’m mulling over the complexity of  situations, moving on, never discussing the issues, or carrying baggage for too long.  just mulling.

in my most recent history i relocated to north carolina to join a team in a large retail home improvement company.  i was SO excited to know that i could impact sales and revenue, customer experience and learn a whole new business model.  i get giddy when learning new complex systems.  it forces me to shift paradigms and tap into my inner resources while adding in new data.  i’m such a business geek sometimes.

very few companies onboard their mid to senior level people very well.  most of the focus seems to go to the senior executive level or the line managers.  when i was told that i’d be onboarded with a special project i was very excited.  i thought “here’s a company that cares about the success of their new hires”.

my hiring manager, the vp of ecommerce informed me that i’d be taking on the writing of a business plan that would prove the importance of changing out a major technology investment.  the technology was to be used in the hr department.  i have no background in hr so i have to admit i was concerned.  when i brought it up to my manager, she stated that the person assigned to writing the business plan wasn’t doing a good job.  the general thought was, as she put it, “anyone from microsoft can write a business plan.  have miller do it”.

i can’t speak for anyone else at microsoft, but yes i can write a business plan. i suck at it.   however, i’m much better at writing strategy documents and utilizing a brilliant financial person to create the financial model.  so there i was, in a very awkward position.  my manager’s sponsor wanted me to write a business plan for him that would justify his spend on technology in an area that i had no experience.  THIS was my onboarding.  rock say hello to hard place.  it was a sign of things to come.

while working on the biz plan and trying to learn the hr needs at the same time trying to learn about the team i was to manage, which was the UAT team.  when interviewing and accepting the role of director of UAT, i made it clear that this was not my specialty.  i had always managed the UAT team as part of my senior responsibilities, but i had a director report into me.  hands on testing…not great for a dyslexic add marketing strategist.

so.  i was beginning to hear how horrible things were on day 5.  my manager talked about how other employees sucked to other direct reports.  her sponsor was known for saying “f— ‘em and chuck ‘em” as an effective way of managing teams.  BIG ROCK say hello VERY HARD PLACE.

unrest, distrust, fear, anxiety mixed with terror and it was palpable.

The Cost of Bad Behavior: How Incivility Is Damaging Your Business and What to Do About It

written by: Christine Portath and Christine Pearson

From Publishers Weekly Most Americans have encountered unpleasant or even hostile colleagues and bosses, but incivility is more than just a human resources problem: it also has a financial cost, argue Pearson and Porath, management professors at Thunderbird School of Global Management and the University of Southern California, respectively. The authors identify the range of behaviors that may be perceived as rude (e.g., inappropriate use of cell, texting during meetings, shutting someone out of a network or team) and quantify the costs of lost time and productivity by disgruntled workers making reduced efforts and possibly suffering from weakened commitment, stress or health problems. Citing such companies with positive cultures as Cisco Systems and Starbucks, the authors illustrate how strong leadership nurtures an environment of cooperation and respect. While the data on the prevalence of rudeness in the workplace is disturbing, the authors maintain an optimistic tone and provide credible, useful tips for managers who recognize that valuing people is not only the right thing to do but the key to profit and productivity. (July) Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

As Christine Pearson and Christine Porath acknowledge, the total cost of incivility can be estimated but not calculated because (a) the total cost consists of much more than out-of-pocket expenditures and (b) it is impossible to know the nature and extent of damage to self-image, morale, latent pathologies (e.g. hostility), and motivation of perpetrators and their victims. Then, of course, there are the collateral costs associated with others (e.g. family members and friends) who also become involved. Let’s just say that the cost of uncivil behavior is substantial. That’s the bad news. Now the good news. According to Pearson and Porath, much of it is avoidable.

For example, it is possible to reduce (if not eliminate) incivility in the workplace. After leading off with an especially relevant quotation of Albert Einstein (“The world is a dangerous place, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.”), Pearson and Porath devote most of Chapter 13 to explaining how to create a civil workplace. Here is an abbreviation of their suggestions, “grounded in hard evidence – interviews and survey results with thousands of targets of incivility, not to mention discussions, focus groups, and interviews of hundreds of executives and managers.”

1. Set zero-tolerance expectations. They must be driven by senior management or they won’t go anywhere.

2. Look in the mirror. How do you measure up in terms of your attitude and behavior? What example are you setting?

3. Weed out trouble before it enters your organization. Screen potential clients as rigorously as you do job candidates. Review Point #1.

4. Teach civility. Make certain everyone in the organization understands what civility is so that they can help to establish and sustain (and when necessary, defend) a culture of civility.

5. Train employees and managers. For example, explain how to recognize and cope with the inappropriate behavior of “cunning offenders.”

6. Put your ear to the ground and listen carefully. One option is 360º feedback. Be alert to consensus of opinion and a pattern of uncivil behavior.

7. “When incivility occurs, hammer it.” Incivility is like cancer. Once detected, it must immediately be treated aggressively.

8. “Take complaints seriously.” A culture of civility must also be a culture of candor. An open door policy will encourage people to confide.

9. “Don’t make excuses about powerful instigators.” Offenders’ supervisors must be role models for effective implementation of these and other suggestions, especially #1 and #7. To tolerate incivility is to condone it and then over time, to encourage it.

10. Invest in post-departure interviews. In terms of alleged incivility, there is more to be learned from former employees 45-60 days after departure than there is during an exit interview.

With regard to #3, Pearson and Porath acknowledge the difficulty of picking up on incivility during interviews. However, they do offer six recommendations:

* Up front and personal: “Let all candidates know how important mutual respect is in your organization, that you do not tolerate incivility.

* Tell me more: “Ask for specific examples of their past behaviors when you interview candidates. Get them to support their appealing descriptions of civil behavior with past actions that they actually took.”

* Unique perspectives: “Talk to people at lower levels who have worked with the candidate (think `kiss up, kick down.’)”

* Better now than later: “Use a team approach. If someone on the recruiting team [and there should be several involved in the process] gets bad vibes, pursue it. Time invested could save you a sour hire.”

* Trust but verify: “Check references. Check references. Check references.”

Note: Here’s an opportunity to check out the examples of civil behavior that the candidate cited.

* Drill down: “If you spot a problem [or suspect one], keep searching.”

“Approach each candidate with measured cynicism. Tap internal networks that you and your colleagues have worked so hard to build. Use those contacts to get a full profile of the candidate – across levels, across divisions, across functions.” These are only two of several clusters of specific suggestions that are inserted throughout the narrative.

Pearson and Porath are hardcore pragmatists who seem almost wholly preoccupied with knowing and then sharing what they have learned about what works, what doesn’t, and why. Specifically, how to reduce incivility’s measurable costs such as job stress: $300-billion a year incurred by U.S. corporations, much of the result of workplace incivility. They are also idealists in that they remain convinced that a workplace need not be the toxic waste area. Recent Gallup research indicates that only 29% of the U.S. workforce is positively engaged (i.e. loyal, enthusiastic, and productive) whereas 55% is passively disengaged. That is, they are going through the motions, doing only what they must, “mailing it in,” coasting, etc. What about the other 16%? They are “actively disengaged” in that they are doing whatever they can to undermine their employer’s efforts to succeed. Is it any wonder that, in the United States, 80% of the people surveyed believe that incivility is a problem? Moreover, 96% have experienced it at work, 80% believe they get no respect there, and 75% are dissatisfied with the way uncivil behavior is handled.

review on www.amazon.com:

The total cost of incivility can only be estimated but its toxic impact and consequent waste are certain. Credit Christine Pearson and Christine Porath with providing in this book a comprehensive, cohesive, and cost-effective plan to respond before additional damage is done. Theirs is a brilliant achievement. Bravo!

copied from Rosabeth Moss Kanter at HBR

Apple and the Leadership Pause

Back when Apple was first an entrepreneurial wonder and I was a baby consultant often in Cupertino, I used to think of Apple in baseball analogies. Apple was the Boston Red Sox, exciting and colorful but doomed to be second to IBM’s New York Yankee-like deep pockets and market domination.

Not any longer. The tech leagues have expanded, and while IBM is still a powerhouse, it does not play in consumer markets. Apple is now a game-definer and game-changer, in major consumer segments.

Behind Apple’s recent successes, including strong prospects for the iPad launched on April 3, is a remarkable leadership phenomenon: a founder who returns after a long pause to rescue the company, bringing a new mindset rather than trying to restore former glory. Ted Waitt of Gateway couldn’t do it. The jury is still out on Michael Dell. I know politicians who have used time out of office to reflect and redirect. But there are few with as productive a time away as Steve Jobs.

Jobs and friends incorporated Apple in 1977. In 1985, as the Macintosh division that Jobs headed under-performed but spent lavishly, John Sculley, the CEO that Jobs had recruited from Pepsi, demoted Jobs and made Jobs feel marginalized enough to resign. In 1996, Jobs arrived on Apple’s campus for the first time in nearly 11 years, becoming interim and then permanent CEO (until he relinquished the post recently due to illness).

He left angry; he returned triumphant. In the pause between Apple engagements, he appeared to learn a few things — not perhaps from his stumbling startup, NeXt, but from Pixar, which connected him to the entertainment world.

Apple’s biggest mistake under Jobs I was a closed system. Apple’s triumph under Jobs II is a much more open system serving as innovation accelerator.

The closed system prevented independent developers from building more things to make more Apples more useful to more people. Jobs II corrected that mistake in a huge way, matching iPods with the iTunes store and making iPhones all about the Apps. Apple has thus demonstrated the virtues of getting thousands of independent developers and entrepreneurs working for Apple by creating content to make Apple devices even more useful.

The Apps also represent continuity in terms of Apple culture and Jobs’s ability to inspire cult-like devotion. Apple began with technology passion and a social mission: “bicycles for the mind.” What a great purpose to animate a company. Jobs and his co-founders set out to democratize computing power and make it available conveniently to the masses. Apple moved technology from the realm of the esoteric into everyday use for ordinary users. It was then and is now all about the user, the user’s experience, ease of use, and the quality-of-life-enhancing things that Apple technology enables for users.

I know suburban stay-at-home mothers whose book clubs discuss their favorite Apps rather than the assigned book. Software and game developers have decided that apps represent their best opportunity to start a business; one suggested to me that iPhone and iPad stores will be as big as the Internet itself in terms of stimulating venture formation.

“App,” by the way, is a great play on words. Simple cleverness is another Apple virtue. Even the enduring logo is suggestive: taking a bite of the Apple.

Scott Kirsner, a shrewd and knowledgeable technology writer, has assembled experts to find technology and marketing lessons in Apple’s success. I think the leadership lessons are also important. Jobs still has many of the temperamental characteristics of a genius leader, so he is not a perfect model in the new leadership theory. But his experience has much to teach. Being forced out by a Pepsi marketer gave Jobs a pause that refreshed. He returned with a fundamental shift of mindset.

Great world leaders have often lost power, struggled, then returned as better leaders; Nelson Mandela’s 27 years in prison are an extreme but instructive case. Perhaps corporate leaders also need time away from a company they begin with, in order to open their minds to new possibilities. Perhaps the pause button should be turned into a career accelerator.